Grrr... I tried twice to write a long and involved post. Both times it failed on me. And for some bizarre reason, the format of this editing page has become completely different.
Well, I'm not going to waste time rewriting that post a third time. I have much more important ways to waste time. So I'm afraid you're going to miss out on my brilliant prose and diction and rapier wit and lightning-fast intellect and I'll just sort of summarize what I was going to write.
First, go to Google and type in "miserable failure" and hit the "Search" button. Or even better, hit the "I'm feeling lucky" button. Hilarious, isn't it? The best part is, this isn't because of a glitch or some joke played by the people who run Google. It's because Google finds pages by looking at other pages (to greatly summarize something I don't entirely understand myself) and so many people have called him a "miserable failure" and linked to that biography that Google thinks he is the miserable failure. George W. Bush is a miserable failure! (I know it's pointless since Google already has the search, but I couldn't resist jumping on the bandwagon.)
Second, on a less cheerful note, I'm glad I don't live in Louisiana. I first found out about this while reading Jay Grant's blog, who is famous for writing a comic strip that's irreverent and twisted and just plain fucked-up. Now, since he's not an incredibly reliable source, I thought it might be a joke or a hoax. But no; search for (Go Google! :)) Marcus McLaurin and you'll find articles about it by much more reputable sources. Here's one. At first I didn't believe it, but now I just wish it wasn't true. I really think it's time those fuckheads - teachers and principals and elementary school administrators! - figure out what year it is.
I just got a paper back. I got 20 out of 28 on it. Considering there was an important part I completely left out because I couldn't manage to get a working answer for, I think that's a decent grade. Considering someone who had the same problem as me got a 12 out of 28, I think I did pretty damn good. (yes, too bad for him better luck next time i hope he's doing ok in the class, etc.)