Sunday, May 16, 2004

I got glasses yesterday.

My right eye is normal, or even better than average maybe, but my left eye has been weak for about 5 years or more. It's 20/40, or even worse. I had contacts - or rather, a contact, only in the left eye - for a few weeks during my senior year of high school, but that didn't last. When it broke, when the lens split, I decided that having a lens was too much hassle for too little reward. Whenever I've had my eyes tested, or tried on glasses close to my prescription, I've always described it like a 3D movie, because the biggest difference it makes is in depth perception. Normally I have bad depth perception, because one eye sees far and the other sees near, and the two barely bother to change focus, I think.

But glasses are less hassle than a contact lens, and it seems (though this could be just my imagination) that my vision has got a little worse lately. So I got glasses on Saturday. They're squarish, thin-framed, and black.

So, a summary: I now have glasses, regularly spike my hair, have lost more than 10 pounds since freshman year, and own several button-down shirts and a leather jacket, which may not be the very latest "cool" fashion but are still very different from what I used to wear. I think I would be practically unrecognizable to a high school friend. Wow.

I wasn't sure if I wanted to write this or not. I had hopes of surprising some people with the glasses, and when I hit the "publish" button I've blown any chance of that. But it finally occurred to me - so what? I mean, surprising people just for the fun of surprising them - well, that might, maybe, be nice. But surprising people to fish for compliments, or to see if my look has really changed as much as I think, or worst of all, in the hopes that they would find me more attractive... No. That way, madness lies. I need to let it go, give up. My life may or may not be bad, but thinking like that couldn't make it anything other than worse.

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