When I read this and I got to the second-to-last paragraph, I got the glimmers of an strong insight. It was something to do with the futility of predicting the future, and/or how this political season seems so unprecedented and unpredictable that it looks like it could lead to another party realignment. But I'm too busy and distracted to think about it now, to follow those glimmers all the way to the insight. Can anyone else do that? I'll award 50 points to someone who follows the train of thought from Pollack's summary of the problems with Nader to an important epiphany about the nature of American politics, the Democratic party, or something similar.
Why am I so busy? Well, writing stories for the April Fool's issue is a lot of fun. I'm definitely going to be wearing a big shit-eating grin all day Thursday at the people I'll have mocked and/or made laugh out loud. But everything in the CT has to be changed to fit the theme or at least to be funny, and that's a fair amount of work. You never notice how much you take the template for granted until you try to make every single damn thing in it a joke.
And there's more. There's the regular issue on the way, though that seems (seems) like it should (should) be unusually easy. And I have a homework assignment due Tuesday morning. And I agreed to write an Editorial Observer. It was either that or write up the Ed Board, since I'm now on the group that speaks for the opinion of the CT and it's my turn to write one. *Sigh*... and I had been so happy about this week looking easy, too. Hah. So, does anyone have any ideas about what I could write an editorial about? Bonus points for something that actually has to do with UR, instead of my boring and overcomplicated political opinions. So far I've got "Why I agree with Rob Clemm"... any other ideas?
Dammit. Since I couldn't go to the gym Saturday morning or this morning, I really should go Monday morning, right? But there's no way I'll have time for it around class, the nap I'd need if I do go, and all my work. Oh well... Tuesday morning before class, I swear! :)
Bleh. Just read G's Livejournal. Bad idea. The "Music: La Musica di Notte" note was a fleeting hope that there would be some nostalgic memories there, but it was squashed right away by stupid shit. I don't need to hear about her sex life, and calling herself a Goth is obviously false so sounds like childish posing to me, and even though I'm sure there's more to it the whole "throwing away a joint" story sounds pretty self-righteous to me, and dammit, why does she get to be so happy? Why can't I be so happy and at peace with someone else and - especially - with myself?
There's actually very little emotional intensity in all that, so it's more because I felt like stream-of-consciousness writing than it is angry or sad venting. But still, it's not sunshine and kittens either. I'm wondering if I should break ties with her even further. No, it probably wouldn't matter; if this sets me off - and it barely does, really; as I said, I'm writing about this just because I'm in the writing mood - then anything at all equally cheerful would. And avoiding cheerfulness is not generally considered good, duh.
I noticed something while writing: I complain that hope of a nostalgic memory was squashed, but then she goes on to mention wings, and I'm 90% certain that she's talking about a pair I bought her at a Renaissance Fair one time. And again, the most annoying thing of it all to me is G expressing a childish, innocent joy in something, anything at all. Further proof, not that any is needed, that my problems are very much in my head rather than caused by anyone or anything else. Dammit.
Well, to end on a positive note: keeping busy (assuming I'm not so busy that I'm sleep deprived or beating myself up emotionally for not working hard enough) is definitely good for my mood. Feeling important, actually to some slight extent being important, doing stuff that's fun or necessary rather than just killing time, not having time to stop and dwell on my problems... it's all very, very nice. Once in a while I complain to myself about becoming some workaholic who doesn't even notice his life passing him by because he spends it at the office. Hah - just goes to show I'll worry about anything at all.